The Opium Trail

Various images flesh across your computer screens in no particular order:

Goggle-eyed Mr Business
Reclining in first class seat of United Airlines

Shots of towel-headed camel riders
Lolloping over sand-dunes
Inter-cut with helpful BBC map of Afghanistan,
John Snow’s size fourteen Hush Puppies

Inter-cut with shots of
The A.J. Alvarez
Various moustachioed types
A-waiting on the ship’s a-loading

Close up of
Dude with uncanny resemblance
To Alfredo Garcia and therefore
Warren Oates

A long way away in Bari, Italy
Mr Canzano on the phone
To Mr Carmichael
So tell me, David, how much
Do you intend to fix this vessel?

Scenic shots now of Dubai City
Courtesy of the Emirates Tourist Board

Mr Business in darkened shades
Stepping off the 747
In his hand the all important attaché case

On the tarmac below
A black Mercedes Benz
And of all people – Frank Zappa
Dressed as Sheik your booty!