The Coma Girl Ream

The story so far
As told in the Coma Girl Ream

To be read in a doom-laden voice (shades of Fraser) against a background of air sirens (shades of Warmington on Sea):

Flying through the night
In ol’ Henri Claude’s kite
Flipping through a dream
The coma girl’s ream
The horsemen are in the news
Let’s the jihads pays their dues
The Commissioner is wishin’
The black box ain’t missin’.

Citizens panic, citizens flee.
Havelockian Wrath comes to Kadath.
Plots start to hatch
Chins to involuntary scratch
The headlines breed
Aliens the new batch!

Satellite Springer falls to earth,
Golf buggies spit up the turf
The war on Terror gathers pace
With those Kamikazi Trojans
In the race
Kneel before the Wall
Lest the Elders forget it all

When the black ops go fishin’,
And ol’ Danker goes missin’
Send in the A team -

It’s just another dream
Here in the Empire of Ice Cream
Bring out the qat
And the high-falutin’ professors
In party hats