Springer Suicide
News just in…
The Monkhouse begins to read slowly, thoughtfully and finally a little prophetically even though this is just the news:
On Tuesday, the family of L. Springer the Third claimed in a statement that the 72-year-old Springer was distraught over a heart condition. He bought a shotgun, took his beloved boat out on a sunny Saturday, tied the anchor around his feet, took his wallet out and left it inside the boat. Shot himself in the face with a shotgun, and managed to neatly fall out of the craft and float for 11 miles and 11 days, upstream, with the anchor of a 41-foot-long sailing vessel tied to his ankles and dozens of search-and-rescue teams scouring the bay for his body.
Mrs Springer is currently convalescing in a private clinic in Switzerland.
The Monkhouse begins to read slowly, thoughtfully and finally a little prophetically even though this is just the news:
On Tuesday, the family of L. Springer the Third claimed in a statement that the 72-year-old Springer was distraught over a heart condition. He bought a shotgun, took his beloved boat out on a sunny Saturday, tied the anchor around his feet, took his wallet out and left it inside the boat. Shot himself in the face with a shotgun, and managed to neatly fall out of the craft and float for 11 miles and 11 days, upstream, with the anchor of a 41-foot-long sailing vessel tied to his ankles and dozens of search-and-rescue teams scouring the bay for his body.
Mrs Springer is currently convalescing in a private clinic in Switzerland.
posted by sp at 12:42 pm
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