Man at Desk (2)

The man sitting at the desk was wearing a grey suit; there was a streak of white in his dark hair. - Something about him suggested the old school. - Not so much of ties, but of manner and manners. - Eliding with this thought was the feeling she had seen him somewhere before.

Man at Desk

A man was sitting at an empty desk.
There was nothing else in the room.

White Light, White Heat

Finally, she had understood what they meant by a Masonic handshake.

It – the eye - was still winking at her when there was a flash of white light – blast of white heat, and she was sucked in.

Crossed wires

Somewhere in the room below she heard:

We must have got our wires crossed.

They did, she thought. It happens sometimes.

Crack in the ceiling

For some time she had been studying the crack above her, when, disturbingly, it began to open up.

As it did so, she glimpsed an eye winking at her – by association - through a dollar bill.

Crack in the wall

There was a crack in the wall above her head… She realised it must have been the ceiling.

Shadowy doctors

On opening her eyes, she found she was not only looking down at herself but slightly to the left of the shadowy doctors.

A patient ?

How many people there were or what exactly they were trying to do she could not determine. The entire procedure – she couldn’t call it operation – even if she felt she was in some way a patient - was being conducted in such a cold, impersonal way it was almost unnerving.

Straw

A light of the sort one finds in a dentist’s surgery was on above her; someone had put a straw up her nose.

The master’s chambers

According to Miss St Clair the tunnel turns into a corridor with doors on either side. At the end of the corridor there is a light. - A light she associates somewhat predictably with hopefulness. At the same time, she begins to experience a feeling of weightlessness as if she is not quite walking but gliding into the Master’s chambers…

Factors relating to length

The question was rhetorical, but could length depend on one or all of the following factors

(1) Sense of sin
(2) loss
(3) last meal
(4) pain due to illness
(5) hesitancy
(6) factors outside human knowledge

The tunnel experience (2)

What interested Allbright – and not purely from an academic viewpoint was the notion of its durability. Could one time the experience? Was it indeed the same length for all?

The Tunnel Experience

Dieterling describes it in his paper The Tunnel Experience as foetal or fatal knowledge. Some instinct that stays with us from birth. The tunnel of our last journey that beckons us back to our fathers – those old gods who – in our infinite – Dieterling extemporising here, modern wisdom we have forgotten and consigned to the dust of the Milky Way…

$

There was between them a tacit agreement.

At the end of each encounter he would slip the dollar bills into the lacquer box on the bedside table.

Little Swan

He called her his little swan.
He spoke in a soft, caressing voice calculated for surrender
And when he came above her – his wings beating briefly – like all big and powerful men - it seemed that his face was about to rip apart and the monster would pop out. –

Bow-men of Shu

She did not at first understand until, one day she received the postcard of a Buddhist temple. On the back was a quotation from the Chinese.


Here we are, picking the first fern shoots
And saying: when shall we get back to our country
Here we are because we have the Ken-men for our foemen

Ideogram

Stitched in red on the back of the blue dressing gown was an ideogram that looked like a double $.

Encounter (4): backsides

There was a kind of impersonal symmetry to it. She turned her back to slip under the sheets. The man – in turn - turned his back to take off the blue dressing gown.

Encounter (3)

He appeared as if from nowhere - behind her.

She was given a start. But the man – standing with his arms folded in the sleeves of a short blue dressing gown - seemed to take no notice. Instead, he apologised for what for what he described as necessary precautions… Then, without further ado, he led her into the bedroom.

Encounter (2)

Had she imagined it? The faint gasp – gurgle of excitement in the voice as she was instructed to open her eyes.

The flat was luxuriously furnished; but she chose not to see that. Instead she went and stuck her nose to the windowpane. If she looked very hard she could see the people moving in ant formation below.

Encounter (1)

She was instructed by her pager to go to reception at the bottom of the tower. Here she was handed an envelope with a passkey for the service lift and an earphone.

When she reached the top of the building, she was instructed – via the earphone – to close her eyes and count to ten.

Electric Phantoms

The lights from the street appeared almost spectral.
Like electric phantoms.

As she turned back into the room, and walked towards the open suitcase, they seemed to exhort her those phantoms – through the twilight – they pulled her back from her twisted box of memories…

Proverbs for Paranoids (3)

Esp. for Paranoid Writers:

That bastard Pynchon always gets there before you!

Proverbs for Paranoids (2)

Esp. for Paranoid CEOs:

The little guy can access your e-mail, company accounts etc, but you have the barcode on his implants.

Proverbs for Paranoids (1)

Generally applicable:

No one is out to get you, when they are.

Run Run Run

The music came on inside her head… It pressed the panic button. She took the case from the top of the cupboard and threw it on the bed. She went to the dresser and pulled open the underwear drawer. She told herself. Don’t be Paranoid.

Dodgy Tap

She got home to find the shower on – water spilling over the tray.

She specifically remembered checking it before she went out.

She told herself. Don’t be Paranoid, O. It’s just that dodgy tap. The washer needs changing.

Knight Rider said (7)

In this town corruption is endemic. – It’s in our blood. – We are - to quote an old gangster - artistes in the science of kickbacks. We smirk at the black book of our collective Chicago memories. The fact of the matter is,

If Mr Manfedo Mancinnini had not existed, Mr Salem Shazam would have had to invent him. –

Knight Rider said (6)

In Mancinnini’s case I recall it was always food metaphors mixed in with sports. – Life is an egg and spoon race with the glue tacked to the spoon. - A boxer taking a dive, an owner kidnapping his own horse. – A man selling bat meat hamburgers and French fries without the mayo.

I believe it must have been in his make-up, his twin inheritance as an Italian American.

Knight Rider said (5)

The diminutive fellow always stood at the front, hands in pockets of shiny suit. – He paid no attention to the notes that he took out of his attaché case at the beginning of the lesson. There was something pure – almost reckless about his improvisation.

Class and that includes you KR, no one wants to stay a two-bit player! You must play for the big cheese. Make sure you wrap it in mortadella!

Knight Rider Said (4)

By strange coincidence back in his youthful days where the idea of starting his own business and mucking in with free enterprise held some perverse appeal this correspondent attended a night school course given by the said Mancinnini. The title of the course was something appropriately dull like The Rudiments of Book-Keeping, or Accountancy for Young Upwardly Mobile Professionals, but in Mancinnini’s hands it might just as well have been:

How to cook the books and keep your mother-in-law happy.

Knight Rider Said (3)

So what’s new après the black shack out? I draw Readers attention to the photo inset of two ball players in the city corruption stakes, Salem Shazam and Manfredo Mancinnini… Why you may ask is Shazam sucking on a lollipop if not to say how pleased he is with his creative accountant?

Man with Lollipop

A headache, not a migraine she hoped.

The doctor said she could have food allergies, she should do tests… even if she has aversion to doing tests, someone poking around in her body, checking out her insides. -

When she pulled up at the chemist’s, a man came out, smiling at her.

She must have kept staring. As he walked up the street, he turned round, still smiling. – In his hand she saw was a lollipop.

Are You Being Followed?

The car followed O out of the multi-storey; she happened to look up in the mirror, and saw the driver. – His face partially hidden by the sun flap.

He followed her a couple of blocks before turning off with an exaggerated spin of his wheel.

Multi-story Rant

(Knight Rider guesting)

As a rule I hate driving, do not see the point of sitting in traffic jams. - Hogging horns, waiting on some geek who’s about to turn right. But then what do you expect from those geeks with rightist tendencies! - As a rule I hate car parks more, particularly those of the multi storey variety. Where you have to go up and down and skid to avoid Starsky and Hutch, and if your vehicle happens to be an automatic you’ve got no control on the bends. And you got to do three three point turns to negotiate between two concrete pillars and some geek who’s stuck his big end over your lines. Yes, folks, give me any day of the week a long stretch of asphalt and one of those ticko machines that accept your free change and are so precisely weighted that something – however small - always comes back. Give me that any day of the week over one of those surly geeks, sitting there with their jack off mags waiting for you to dig out your loose change from your tight jean pocket. And won’t get up to open up for some old lady ‘cos they can’t be assed to zip up.

Knight Rider said (2)

Always remember to check in your wing mirror!

Advice to Italian Motorists

Do not reverse on the hard shoulder
Do not reverse into main roads
Do not overtake in the oncoming lane
Do not wear shades on rainy days
Do not speak on mobiles continuously
Do not traverse railway crossings when the light is red
Do not stop on the slip road to check oil
Do not skip lights even when no one is coming
Do not beep horns gratuitously in traffic
Maintain a level of patience and sang-froid

P.S.

One of the odder little anomalies in this whole business involves Reverend “Lightin’” Hopkins who claims to have seen the ancient city of Sodom in a dream. – The Reverend in his madness and folly wishes to set out for the Holy Land to the exact site where he believes the city is. I ask you, readers, if the Reverend knows where Gomorrah is, and my guess it ain’t in his underpants… Now get this, Rev Hopkins long time friend Langland Springer has been asked to put up money for the gig.

Knight Rider Said

Knight Rider said:

The question is:

What does the future hold? Are we going to be having more of these blackouts? Will the sand continue to blow in our faces as we seek to rationalise, compartmentalise and get on with our own sweet lives?

Well, the message is clear.
The mainstream media have denied sand got in the works.
The corporadoes have denied sand got in the works.
The government and Mr Livingstone I presume (Ho! Ho!) have denied sand got in the works.
But I invite all my readers to study the markets closely - in particular, the share price of Shazam Inc in the days leading up to the blackout shack-out.

Click here (2)

For the conspiracy view, natch.

Click here (1)

Click here, or here for Mayor Livingstone’s full reaction.

Breaking News (4)

Shazam engineer apologises under pressure

Lawrence King chief engineer at Shazam says he has been misquoted.

I am sincerely sorry, he said last night, if I have led the public to believe that there is so to speak a fault line in the concept of electricity. In future I guess I shall just have to learn to keep my mouth shut and keep science out of the public domain.

Click here for video and voice.

Breaking News (3)

Shazam engineer doubts existence of electricity.

Click for appliance of science v. black hole of electricity.

Breaking News (2)

Bush dog off the leash

Governor J Bush pictured left on the lawn of Gubernatorial Palace is caught of guard by his dog, Tricky Doo. (Readers are invited to caption the picture)

Breaking News (1)

Shazam Inc says sorry

A spokesman for Shazam Inc apologised yesterday to the public for the problems caused by the blackout. A full investigation into the affair is currently under way.

Where were you in the Blackout? (7)

Alex Bigham was stuck on the green line: "We stopped in the middle of the tunnel. It was completely dark. The conductor led us down the steps. We couldn't see anything... We went through the tunnels looking for vampires. Worst luck, we got out safely."

Where were you in the Blackout? (6)

Gov. Jeb Bush: "I was in the Adirondacks walking the dog."

Where were you in the Blackout? (5)

Monica Fletcher was a passenger on Fred West’s train: " I stayed behind to help women with babies and the elderly. There were a few handicapped people there, as well."

Where were you in the Blackout? (4)

Fred West was the driver at Hanger Lane: “ I helped literally hundreds of people reach the emergency exits”.

Where were you in the Blackout? (3)

Sen. Frank Carson: “I was in a meeting with one of my summer interns ... when the lights went out and we were told to evacuate the building, naturally."

Where were you in the Blackout? (2)

A woman called O: "I was stuck in the Springer Tower, between two floors. I was terrified. You see, I suffer from claustrophobia"

Where were you in the Blackout? (1)

Mayor Kenneth Livingstone: " I was just across the river, in my office in the Foster building… As a matter of fact, I was sitting at a table. It was pretty bright, and I did not notice the lights went out until somebody tapped me on the shoulder."

Dodge Not Under Attack

Asked for his reaction, Commissioner Raymond Queneau said:

I can categorically say there is no evidence to connect today’s blackout with any group or groups plotting terrorist attacks within the confines of our city.

Blackout in Dodge!

Thursday’s blackout left thousands of residents, commuters and tourists flooding the streets of Dodge just as the afternoon rush hour was getting under way.

The exodus was massive, but city-dwellers weathered the day's events in a spirit of controlled chaos.

Thousands clogged the Kennedy Bridge on their way out of the City, calmly sharing lanes with cars and taxis in 90 degree heat. Many climbed over the barrier to use the bridge's walkway.

But many others were stuck. Some above ground in elevators, and some underground in hot, crowded tubes.

For the most part, traffic ran smoothly. Civic minded citizens took it upon themselves to be traffic wardens, standing in the street and assisting motorists on streets with no signals.

Once initial worries of terrorism wore off, most people took things in their stride.

The driver’s version (3)

Driver Fred West said his train literally came to a halt just as they were pulling into the station at Hanger Lane. He helped get hundreds of passengers off the train, through the tunnels and up through the exits.

"It took us about an hour to get the people off," West said. "We had a full house, about 800 people on the train. Luckily, everybody behaved themselves."

One of the worst things, according to West, was that the air conditioning went out along with the lights.

" There were a lot of parched throats,” he said. “Personally I always carry a bottle of Evian on this line. ”

Springers to the rescue

Springer contractee, Dennis Neilsen said he and his co-worker were responding to any building that needs them.

"We're just driving around to all the buildings we maintain and just checking in with supervisors, seeing if anyone's been stuck, any problems," Neilsen said. "Lifts aren't running in the city, so most of the people that are stuck are stuck until we get there."

A woman called O

A woman called O was stuck for an hour between the twenty-first and twenty-second floors of Springer Tower. Building maintenance workers could not get her out, but Springer contractees eventually helped to free her.

"They had to open the entire top of the lift," she told Knight Rider. "In the beginning, I was scared. The lights faded out and there was just darkness. The lift stopped, and I didn't know what to do. I just kept banging the door."

The end of the shift

When she stepped in the lift, after clearing dishes for ten hours on the trot, the only thing on O’s mind was the fact that it was the end of the shift, and she wouldn’t have to think about dishes for another twenty four seven. It was, after all, going to be her day off.

Pain in the Humvee

A Humvee had been left over night. The owner – one of those schoolboy yuppie types - wanted Willard to give the Humvee a wash – not just any old wash, but a spic and span. Folks pay through the nose for a spic and span, says Willard. But when he gets in in the morning, Willard find the Humvee covered in sand, like it’d been through Desert Storm. You know, says Willard. I pride myself on getting the job done.

When Willard goes to put on the hose, nothing works. I’m telling you, says Willard, I thought there was a real pain in the Humvee.

Storm in the night

A thunderstorm came in the night. With ball and streak lightning the city was lit up like a Christmas tree. In the morning huge queues were reported at the car-washes. The storm had brought sand off the Gobi desert weathermen said.

Lot’s wife

She looked back
Not from innocence
But curiosity
(How typical of His Wife)

And God
(The Capricious God
Himself)
Turned her into a pillar of rock salt.

These things the Reverend took as a sign, even if, as he read the text, his mind was elsewhere.

The City in the Sand

The city, if it was a city, ‘twas at times obscured by banks of sand that came rolling in over the lapping dunes. At one point he decided it wasn’t a city at all, but some singular building, perhaps a ruin; he had no way of judging its distance.

And when the sand – the tarnished sand - enveloped him – just as had been predicted, he held himself and rocked, singing a song without words or tune.

Sand

Everywhere he looked was sand. - Sand the shade of tarnished silver that had not gone entirely black.

Falling dream

The dreamer enters the lift
The lift doors close
The dreamer begins his precipitous descent
The lift loses control
The dreamer wakes up
Disorientated
Wondering if he has fallen through a hole
In the universe